Friday, January 18, 2013

My Own Little World

What a morning!  I got a call from Ethan's sitter at 6 am saying she has a fever, chills and body aches.  It was the first time I had to drop him off at a regular daycare.  As comfortable as I am with this daycare (Garrison goes there for before school drop off and in the summer) it still sucks.  It made me realize how lucky I am to have such an awesome in home sitter for him who I am comfortable with and who, most importantly, he loves.  Good thing I only work part time and I can pick him up at 2 today. 

I posted this on FB today but my cousin recently insisted (okay, she has been insisting for months) that I listen to Randy Rogers Band.  I heard one of their songs this morning on the way to work and I love, love, love them... his voice especially!  I am dead set on downloading some of their music now and seeing them live at some point.

I love the song, "My Own Little World" by Matthew West.  You can watch the video below.


I often find myself living in my own little world.  And as much as I feel like I have a purpose in that world (among family and close friends) I can't help but wonder what else God wants from me outside of that world and, more importantly, outside of that comfort zone.  I tend to "shine" around those I am close to or comfortable with.  I have a really hard time showing God's love to others though.  I constantly feel Him pushing me to get out of my comfort zone but I constantly push back.  "Thanks but no thanks God... maybe next time!"

Many events in my life recently have shown me that I need to start focusing my prayers on what His plans are for me outside of my own little world.  It has been evident since elementary school that God gave me the gift of talking.  I think my mom would agree that the constant marks on my report cards of "excessive talking" would back that statement up.  Haha. 

I feel like God is constantly telling me to talk to people I don't know.  Maybe just to show them that someone cares and someone is interested in their life.  I wanted to share a story with y'all and feel free to think I'm crazy because I know I'm not. ;)  The other day I passed by a girl who was walking with her little brother.  Just as if someone came over a loud speaker I heard this, "Tell her that she is special and she is going to do great things in life."  I KNEW, without a doubt, it was God.  We were walking out of a store and she was in front of me.  She held open the door for me, turned around, looked right into my eyes and smiled.  HELLO!  Perfect opportunity to tell her what He wanted me to.  And what did I do?  I smiled back and walked to my car.  Why?  Because I wasn't comfortable telling a complete stranger that.  What if she thought I was a freak?  What if she laughed at me? 
OR
What if that would have made her day?  What if that would have given her the courage to make a decision she has been struggling to find the answer to?  What if that would have been life changing for her to hear?

I need to really start trusting God and stop being scared.  I'm sure Jesus faced many uncomfortable moments in His life here on earth and he didn't back down or tell God no. 

Sometimes I have stuff figured out and can share it with you.  And sometimes I just need to work through some issues and I must say this is a very therapeutic way to do that.  So thanks to those of you who are still reading this rambling post!  I will be sure and share the next story of when God asks me to tell someone something and hopefully it will have a different ending.  It doesn't happen often but I will be ready for it this time around!

Jewels*

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