The Woman I Want to Be

Something has been weighing on my mind a lot lately and I have this feeling I need to share it.  I have written a lot about struggles we face as women, like Comparing Ourselves to Others and Focusing on Our Gifts.

Day in and day out I see women around me who focus so much on what they look like, myself included at times.  If we spent as much time and energy strengthening our relationship with God and our families as we do on our appearance we would have the kind of fulfillment that no dress size, hair style or designer shoes could fill.   

You know when I feel the most beautiful?

When I am on a date night with my husband...

When I am wrapped up in the daily fun and chaos of mom world...

 

Even when I look like this at the end of the day...

Here's the deal ladies - I really do understanding wanting to be healthy, even when I'm not on a two week workout kick.  :)  I'm not saying every woman who goes to the gym, eats salad, juices or does a cleanse is vain and doesn't care about anything but her appearance.  I am just saying that our reasons for doing these things should be focused around being healthy and not around looking a certain way.  If those reasons involve looking like someone else, hoping your husband will stay faithful or trying to get a certain guy I can pretty much guarantee you need to change your perspective.  There is nothing wrong with wanting a six pack or wanting less cellulite or wanting to be a smaller size.  But obsessing over those things is wrong. 

If you are only secure with yourself when you are at your ideal weight, your hair is freshly dyed and you have a full face of make up that is a false sense of confidence.  My confidence and self worth is rejuvenated every day by the love God has for me.  I know that with Him on my side I will not fall.

I try to think about what I want my sons' future wives to be like and I try to model that behavior.  I want them to feel beautiful when they are at their worst - like when they are waddling around 9 months pregnant.  I want them to feel beautiful when their husband (one of my sons) looks at them after they have just been through 20 hours of labor.  I don't want them to need expensive beauty products and personal trainers for confidence.  And I want them to raise children with a song sense of self worth.  I read a friend's post earlier today that talks about how we can influence our children and their perspective on beauty.   Check it out here. 

Do I need to work out?  Yes.  Should I eat healthier?  Yes.  Would I like to always feel comfortable in my clothes and even buy smaller sized clothes.  Yes.  But I'm not going to obsess over those things and I'm certainly not going to let them control my happiness.  Instead I choose to focus on God and His view of me. 

I am so grateful that I have a husband who finds me attractive no matter what my current jean size is.  And he loves me even when I look like this.  That's saying somethin'.

I really love what Proverbs 31 says about being a virtuous woman.  And guess what?  It doesn't say anything about getting back into a bikini after having a baby.  It doesn't say anything about being a size 4.  It doesn't even say anything about having to have freshly shaven legs every day - thank goodness!  ;)

Some of my other favorites:

Today I encourage you to see yourself how God sees you.   You are beautiful.  You are strong.  You are worthy.  And let His light shine so brightly through you that no one notices that zit on your nose or that grey hair that refuses to lie down flat.  Be the wife, mom and woman you were meant to be!


~Jewels*